To Liseberg and Beyond!

Or actually, just to Liseberg. But Liseberg is so good, it needs no beyond.

Take it away, Buzz!
Poor Buzz... just like Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera, he'll never live down those Disney days.This is one of many failed attempts at capturing myself, Pauline and the Liseberg sign in the same photo. Eventually, we decided the sign must have a reason for hiding and as a result, we no longer pressed the matter. Let the shy be shy, I guess.In full L.A.esque fashion, this star represents Michael Jackson's presence at Liseberg. Reportedly, he spent a day there with friends and family while no others were allowed to enter. I wonder if Neverland got jealous. Pauline outside Liseberg's Lust Garden, which as it turns out, is neither a nudist colony nor a title for vegetarian pornography. Who woulda thought, right?Waiting in line to ride this beast of a roller coaster.Either that guy on the ride is about to cough, pick his nose, sneeze, or pretend his hand is a microphone while he sings a heavenly love ballad. Either way, it's going to be awkward for the woman behind him.Rides and people galore! Liseberg is a feast of fun with a side of joy. Mmm... delicious fun and joy.This spinning death machine has a spectacular finale that includes launching its occupants off the open end. Okay, not really. But that would be quite the spectacle. Not that I'm rooting for that or anything. Anyway... Look! Another picture with a different topic!In an attempt to assert their male dominance, these men among men displayed their ability to squirt water at a ball better than five year old Susie, here. She never had a chance.New York and Miami had a close battle, but in the end, I believe New York came out ahead. Feel free to revel in this monumentally large victory, Rob.Ah yes, the Balder ride which begs the question, which came first? The Tampa Bay Buccaneers lettering or this? Oh well, thievery aside, this photo was taken only seconds before Charlotte(who is in the bottom right of the image) surprised the heck out of me by unexpectedly emerging from the masses.Colorado? I'm confused. No matter. On to the raft ride!Or on to the line before the raft ride. Look at the joy in the eyes of these future rafters. Lines are cool! Especially when you see Derek Zoolander waiting with Pocahontas.I believe that deep down inside each and every one of us, there is an anxious rabbit whose only desire is to ride in a spinning raft. This guy proves it.Eventually though, that rabbit got his wish.
Again delving ever so deeply into the world of philosophy, I would just like to say that there is a certain magic in the ability to crash a vehicle repeatedly into children at no risk of injury or rise in insurance.If only the line were shorter, we too could have broken the space time continuum on Liseberg's Flume ride.Behold, a rather large loop diddy loop of air sucking terror.Thanks to the hall of mirrors, Pauline represented the Lollipop Guild for all to see.This brilliant maze of deceptive perception has a vendetta against slightly less brilliant children who find it wise to run "through" said maze. In other words, while Pauline and I traveled through, we heard a sound much like that of a gunshot which was in fact a child who ran full speed, face first, into one of these plexiglass walls. Something tells me he won't do that again.After enjoying perhaps the most refreshing salads in the world, Pauline and I were ready for more adventures in Liseberg.This rather nice, even calm, section of the park included a band and a dancefloor.The late Michael Jackson's hand print was one of many, though his was the only one with flowers(not to mention a steady flow of people coming up to match hands).It's no Johnny Depp-like match, but my hands are definitely closer than I thought to MJ. Rest In Peace, Michael.At about 9:30pm, when the sky finally started to get dark, the time had come to enter Liseberg's haunted house. Unfortunately I didn't get pics here, but I can atest to the fact that this haunted house was probably better than any I've experienced at Halloween Horror Nights.Somehow managing to survive the haunted house, Pauline and I were able to see the lights of Liseberg, illuminating the park.Yay lights! (Yeah, that was all I could think of here)Out of a 5/100 chance, Pauline and I were only 3 away from winning one of these massive chocolate bars. So close!Is it just me or does this castle totally look like the castle in Shrek 2 that the giant Gingerbread Man bombards? Ah yes, a classic scene in film.

That about does it for this trip to Liseberg. I hope you all enjoyed it. I have one last surprise for you though, so don't go yet. I decided to get all fancy smancy and go beyond the medium of still photo and bring you... a real, live, moving picture film! With sound too!

As you watch, be sure to notice the courteous nature of the Swedes as they try so desperately to get out of my way. All except for that last lady anyway. She couldn't care less.

See you soon, friends and family! Next time, a trip through Goteborg on a Paddan boat! :D

Thanks again!

-That American Guy